This is a free newspaper I picked up in the Russian supermarket around the corner. I can't help but admit, that looking at the frontpage-picture I feel like the Russians know about something we don't know about.
So to prevent me having constant nightmares about this mafia-boss (look at those pimp-rings!) dressed up as a gipsy, who is dressed up as a coloured person and who definetly seems to have something to do with that burning London in the background, could somebody PLEASE TRANSLATE what this newspaper is trying to tell us? Then we can either go on dreaming about pink-flourescent sugar unicorns, or start panicking and walk against walls.